Dining High: Munching charcoal-grilled pork chops with mounds of fresh Greek salad on a sailboat in the Caribbean Sea. Really, who cares what we are eating? Could have been Beef a Roni out of a can given the spectacular views.

Dining Low: Said pork chop. It was still raw and gelatinous and jiggly inside. Ah well. Once again — the view. Who wants a belly full of pork anyway when a bikini and a dive into the warm blue waters are on the afternoon agenda?

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh

Dining High: Enjoying a rich, tender, if-I-were-at-home-I-would-pick-up-and-gnaw-the-bone-braised lamb shank. I am not usually even a lamb girl, but I most definitely want to try this at home. And soon. So expect a braised lamb shank on my menu shortly.

Dining Low: Gluey hunks of fried plantain. Greasy, limp, fried plantain chips. Heavy (and fried yet again) patties of mashed plantains that tasted (and felt) like kindergarten paste going down.

Dining High: Milk-fed veal chop. I actually did pick up the chop and go to town on this one. Couldn’t help myself.

Dining Low: Overhearing 4 pesky women interrogate an extremely patient waiter about WHY, WHY, WHY their turkey Parmesan (as listed on the menu) indeed had Parmesan cheese on it.  Actually, this should really be a highlight — pure comedy.

Dining High: The cheese cart at a French restaurant on-board the ship. Oh the cheese!